Monday, September 29, 2008

2 year anniversary

I can't believe it has been two years since my surgery! I haven't written everything about this time of my life down officially anywhere and I want to keep a good record of it. But because it would be so long I decided to do a short version here and the long version somewhere else. Even the short version is long, sorry.

It was two years ago in June that I had a consultation to get my wisdom teeth out, the right side of my lips had been feeling numb for a while and I could feel my wisdom teeth coming in so I put the two together and decided I needed to get them pulled. When I told the oral surgeon about my numbness he immediately called in an appointment for an MRI and told me I could either have a brain tumor or have had a mini stroke. Of course this freaked me out and I started to cry (a result of being up ALL night the night before with kids). So that same day I went in for an MRI. I had also been having little dizzy spells if I turned my head too fast or if I put my head upside down to blow dry my hair which, of course, I shrugged off as an inner ear infection or something.

After being in the MRI machine for quite some time we were sent to wait for my results. Luckily, we knew the technician and she worked it out to have my OB/GYN give me the results that day instead of having to wait. So we went upstairs and waited...finally my doctor came in with the results. She looked at me and said, "I don't know how to tell anyone what I am about to tell you." Wow! Bad sign. She went on to say I had a brain tumor. She didn't know what kind or whether it was benign or cancerous. All she knew was that it was there. I was sick!!! Of course I started to cry...again. She told me I had to see a neural surgeon to find out more. The only problem was I couldn't get in to see a neural surgeon for another month! So, we waited again, not knowing anything.

After what seemed like forever we met with the neural surgeon and found out I had what is called an acoustic neuroma. A benign tumor, but a very large benign tumor that had to be removed surgically. The doctor actually used the word "giant". He went through all the complications and side effects and told me all about the surgery. In a nutshell, they had to drill a 2 inch hole in my skull behind my ear and take out my inner ear to get to the tumor, resulting in hearing loss on that side and a very good possibility of permanant facial paralysis on my right side, along with other possible complications and side effects. So we set a date for surgery. They also had to take some fat from my abdomen to plug up the hole in my head. Too bad they couldn't take it all out while they were at it.

I went in for surgery the morning of Sep. 26. I got all ready and waited with Jared and my mom and dad for them to take me to the operating room. I was scared out of my mind! As they wheeled my bed back I remember how freezing cold it was in the operating room and thinking as the room was going dark how glad I was I didn't have to worry and wait anymore. I got to go to sleep and Jared and my family had to wait in the waiting room. Lucky me!! 8 1/2 hours later I woke up and I was SICK!!! I was nauseated from the anesthetics and I was dizzy from losing my inner ear and my equilibrium. Not a good combination.

Before surgery the surgeon told me if I didn't have moblity in my face right after surgery it wouldn't come back. Sure enough, I couldn't move my face. The nurse taking care of me looked at me and said, "Oh my goodness, was your face like that before?" Nice. The surgeon checked up on me too and saw my face wasn't in as good of shape as they hoped. I was still a little out of it when Jared came in but I remember the look on his face. He knew my face wasn't working and knew I was probably upset but I remember him telling me how much he loved me and would always love me no matter what.

Time went on and miracles happened. I had a lot of blessings and a lot of people fasting and praying for me and I KNOW my recovery was a direct result of these things. My mobility in my face came back very slowly, suprising everyone. I was not as sick as they told me I would be, and I was up walking around with Jared at my side (I was still REALLY dizzy) faster than they told me I'd be. I had all of my doctors telling me they wished they could bottle whatever was making me recover the way I was. I was also able to come home sooner than expected. (YAY!!!)

I came home and continued to recover quickly but when I went in to get my stitches out, CSF fluid had leaked and made a big bubble on the side of my head. I looked like an alien. They told me it could take up to 6 months for the CSF to re-absorb and they might have to go back in and fix the leak if it was too bad. I got another blessing and prayed a lot! After a couple of days I could tell the bubble had gone down a bit. After a few more days the bubble was gone!!! I went back to the doctor a week later and shocked them all when I told them it had gone completely down. Another miracle! All the while my sweet mom and mother in law took turns every week taking care of my 2 year old Emma and my 9 month old TJ.

It took me a long time to get back to normal but now, 2 years later the only side effects I have are my hearing loss, the right side of my mouth is numb and tasteless, I get a really sour taste in my mouth sometimes for no reason at all that lasts quite a while sometimes, my right eye gets dried out a lot, and when I cry, I only cry out of my left eye. I also have a crater behind my right ear that makes it hard to make my glasses sit straight on my face. I consider myself VERY blessed!!!

This first picture is a couple of days after surgery. I know I look horrible but wanted to post it for two reasons. First, to show how my face was paralyzed. I am actually smiling, you just can't tell. It had actually improved a TON by this time. At first it was all droopy and wouldn't move at all. I could move it a tiny bit when this picture was taken. Second reason is because I think it is hilarious how Emma looks totally freaked out. I don't blame her a bit though.


The next picture is of the welcome home sign my family made for me. If you look close you can see that my mom and sisters decorated my front porch for me too :)


I had a hard time deciding if I should post this last picture. I don't want to gross anybody out but at the same time I want to show what they did to me. This was right after I got home and finally got to wash my hair. I still couldn't make the room hold still and holding my head down in the water made it a lot worse. That is why I am laying on the side of the tub, I am trying not to be sick. My hair grew back pretty fast and I could hide my incision easy but I am a little disappointed I can't see my huge scar now.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

My little vampire

I have just recently really gotten into the twilight series so I thought it was really funny when Rees started getting her side tooth before her two front teeth. The front teeth came in before the other side tooth so I guess it was more of a half vampire look...my own little Renesmee. Now only if she could tell me what she is thinking it would make life a WHOLE lot easier sometimes!

Monday, September 22, 2008

Finally!!!

Okay, so I figured out my camera and ya, I was just an idiot. But now I have some major catching up to do.


I love this picture of Rees. I was packing up all of our food and she got into one of the boxes and found her first chocolate chip cookie. She was pretty happy about it too, like mother like daughter :)


I know Jared's parents have been home for a couple of months now but I never got to post pictures of their homecoming, so here they are. Janie was crying before she even made it down the escalator.






I love this one of Frank kissing Emma on the cheek. She missed her Grandma and Grandpa so much!Anna made a welcome home banner that we all signed, this is a picture of some of the kids holding it up waiting for them to come.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Dang!

So, I haven't posted since we got the internet hooked up because I couldn't find the cord to connect my camera to the computer. Well, Jared found the cord today and I was so excited to finally post but for some reason (probably just me being an idiot) I cannot get it to work!!! I am so frustrated! Good news though...I talked to the people we are buying our house from today and they are almost done moving out!!! Since Jared's parents got home we have been living in our old rental but, knowing we are going to have to move again soon, we left most of our stuff boxed up. If I could figure out my camera I could post a picture of our lovely pile of boxes I have to look at every day. So it is good to hear that we can start fixing up the house soon so we can move in and finally get settled. In the meantime, I will try to figure out how to post pictures. I guess for tonight I will just have to get me a big bowl of ice cream and settle down to read my book :)

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Yay!!!

So, we have the internet at our house again! I am super excited but haven't found the cord to my camera to post new pictures yet. We have been pretty busy moving and going out of town, but I finally feel like I have some down time before we move again so I will have time to do some catching up. I am so glad!!!